I have mentioned in blogs past how hard headed I am. I can be quite resistant to change, and if they would make Dread a Olympic event, I would have tons of gold medals. I am a champ at dreading things. What can I say? It is who I am. But I am working on it. I told my friend Jonathan just the other day that I am working on cultivating a quiet spirit. He laughed. Well, he knows me pretty well and knows that this is quite an undertaking. But I have had some gentle prods from the universe that it is time to tackle this mindset. Given my hard-headedness these proddings usually have to come completely out of context in order to
#1 get me to pay attention and
#2 really take the truth to heart so it can affect change.
So of course what better place than Meridith's wedding? I never would of guessed that being a bridesmaid was actually just a cover for Misi's mini-life lessons seminar.
There were actually three major Aha moments, to borrow that over used phrase from Oprah. I am only going to cover the first here as it has played out in my life so greatly in the last few days. But stay tuned as I will the cover the others in the blogs to come, as I am feeling very honest this summer.
My first truth came to me at the reception when the wedding party joined the bride and groom for their first dance. My feet really hurt, and I was incredibly self-conscious, which most people never take me for. But it happens. So there I was on the dance floor with my amazing escort, James Baker. Let me just stop for a moment and say, I had secretly been hoping since I signed on to be a bridesmaid that James would be my escort down the aisle. Jame is an amazingly handsome man, with an amazing voice. He makes me laugh, but I can talk about spiritual things with him, even in the back of a cab. And he can dance. I mean, like, he gets paid to sing and dance. It really is too bad I am not his type. Anyway...
James and I were out on the dance floor, and he was twirling me around, and I was not having a good time. James looked at me and said, "You know you are a really good dancer, you just need to relax." Wow. There was my bit of truth. Aha, and no kidding. I always recognize the truth because for me when I hear it, the truth always seems somehow more dense than just regular words. They pack more of a punch, if you know what I mean. I knew immediately that that statement applied to so much more than dancing. I laughed at James and said, "Oh darlin' that applies on so many levels."
I love it when my prophets are the people I would never imagine. There is such a great misconception about prophets. The prophets of ancient times weren't necessarily always foretelling future events; more often than not prophets, particularly in the Scriptures, showed up when people got off track. Really what a prophet is is someone who speaks the truth about a situation; they are a sign post that a change of thinking is needed. Their words carry weight and hopefully bring about change. They deliver truth, but it is always up to the hearer what he or she does with that truth. So, by my criteria, James Baker was one of my prophets at Meridith's wedding.
This message came into play for me last Thursday as I had a major job interview in which I had to teach for a group of educators that I very much respect. DREAD - I was doing it in a big way. I was dreading it so much, my head was completely wrecked, and I couldn't get my lesson plan to come together. And the truth of the matter is I never really teach like that anyway. My teaching style is much more organic and only usually falls together a half and hour before I walk into the classroom. But as I said, I was thinking like I was trying to medal in dread. But sometime late Wednesday afternoon I began to hear James Baker, the prophet, in my head saying, "You are a good dancer; you just need to relax." I amended it a bit for the situation - "You are a good teacher; you just need to relax."
It is crazy to me that the truth that I needed for last week was given to me on a dance floor a month ago at Meridith's wedding. It was a timely word, to say the least ,as there are other situations in my life that I need to relax into this summer, and some days I am better at it than others. But baby steps, it is tough to go from being a champ at dread to cultivating a quiet relaxed spirit. But I know that this "Relax" message also circles back to surrendering to the strawberry ice cream, as I mentioned in the previous post. And that is my really mantra for the summer- "Baby I am surrendering to the strawberry ice cream." You have to relax somewhat to surrender, and in the relaxing and surrendering the dread has to go.
More to come on my lessons learned at the wedding....
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